Knockaround Guy

Saturday, May 3 at 10:19 p.m.

If you just saw the replay for the 15th time, you know Patrick Carpentier just got his bell rung.

I'm not even near his race hauler but I can still hear it ringing.

During the wreck that caused that 21-minute red flag delay, Carpentier's No. 10 Lifelock Dodge, got hit...and hit...and hit...and hit again.

He called it a "pinball ride." I say it looked more like a lesson in vertigo.

"Down the backstretch, I saw the crash happening," he said. "I was just trying to go inside to avoid it. Slowing down, I think I got hit from behind, spun around and then hit the inside rail, almost accelerated back to corner three and got into the cars and everybody got into me."

Into you? They just turned you into a badly dented $200,000-plus spinning top.

"It was a pretty hard hit. Thanks for that carbon fiber seat that they've got inside the car now. It was not too bad. [It] knocked the wind out of me but we're okay."

The best part? He was actually smiling when he walked out of the medic center.

These guys are sick.

-- Kent Jennings Brockwell, co-editor  

At least it's not due to rain

Saturday, May 3 at 9:55 p.m.

We're under red flag conditions but at least it's not raining.

Unfortunately, it's due to a massive 11-car crash in turn three. They're doing a big clean up right now but there are several cars that will need a lot of hammer and saw work when they reach the pits.

Denny Hamlin, who has absolutely ruled the track tonight, luckily swerved out of the way of the carnage and kept his lead.

After about 21 minutes of red flag stoppage, they are about to go back to yellow/green conditions.

This just got interesting.

-- Kent Jennings Brockwell, co-editor  

Red, White, Blue and Green

Saturday, May 3 at 7:50 p.m.

The anthem was played, the Blue Angels have flown by and the drivers are in their cars and entering the track.

The green flag is coming and we are heading out to the infield fence for the closest seat in the house.

We'll be back in a few with the post game report. Have fun! And in true home town spirit, go Denny!

-- Kent Jennings Brockwell, co-editor  

Full House (Danny Tanner not included)

Saturday, May 3 at 3:50 p.m.

Is NASCAR the only recession proof entity in the U.S.? Maybe.

Many in the business world (including our own R' Biz coverage) had their doubts about the financial aspects of this weekend's race when the news was released earlier this week that Saturday's NASCAR Sprint Cup Crown Royal Presents The Dan Lowry 400 hadn't sold out yet.

Seriously, however, it wasn't really that big of a deal.

By the time the checkered flag dropped last night, there were reportedly less than 500 tickets left. Seriously, someone with an un-maxed out credit card could have taken care of that.

Nonetheless, Richmond International Raceway president Doug Fritz made the announcement not too long ago that all grandstand seats for tonight's race were gone.

"Ticket sales were steady and we remained optimistic leading into this weekend," Fritz said. "The hard work of our staff and our continued effort to provide a first class experience for our fans continues to pay off.

"Richmond International Raceway is known as a fan favorite and selling out tonight's race is a testament to the dedication of our fans. Even in these tough economic times, our fans at Richmond International Raceway continue to show they are the most loyal in the industry."

Take that, naysayers.

-- Kent Jennings Brockwell, co-editor

Eye (and Hands) on the Prize

Saturday, May 3 at 12:37 p.m.

I just found a way to pay off my student loans.

When we walked into the media center at Richmond International Raceway this morning, something caught my eye. Someone was foolish enough to bring the official trophy for tonight's Crown Royal presents the Dan Lowry 400 NASCAR Sprint Cup Race in to this den of deadline-weary scallywags.

If I can get a moment alone with the trophy, thanks to a key distraction my our photographer John Tatum (fake a rabies induced seizure, buddy), to hell with this Dan Lowry fellow. Victory is mine today! eBay bidding will start approximately two minutes after the greatest five-finger discount in NASCAR history.

Wait a minute...I am getting the stink eye from a track official and I think he has a tazer.

Oh, poo. The plan is foiled. Sorry Sally May, no money for you this month (again).

Oh, well. The sun is still shining, the weather is perfect and it is a wonderful day for racing.

It's also a superb day for tailgating so we are going to head out to have a few "sodas" and see what's happening with this Finnish Bowling  phenomenon (read below).

Pray for me.

-- Kent Jennings Brockwell, co-editor

Foggy but ready

Saturday, May 3 at 9:15 a.m.

Last night was amazing. Hamlin's big win, the Busch/Wallace scuffle, the pit crew fight (yep, there was one), the brawls in the stands -- maybe it was the hot weather.

Anyway, we are hoping for a lot of the same today. And if the phone calls and e-mails I have already received this morning are any indication, we'll get it.

When I woke up this morning, I found an e-mail from Liz and Vince. They are driving down this morning from beautiful and pleasantly aromatic New Jersey to party with the good people of Virginia. They aren't screwing around either.

"Woo hoooooooo!  We are psyched! We just decided Wednesday, found tickets on Craigslist, rented a car and off we go!" Liz writes. "We would love to party with you in RV City. We are a lot of fun and come with party supplies!!! "

Liz, if you are putting that much effort into seeing a NASCAR race in Richmond, I won't let you down. I'll be sure to scrape a few layers of tar of the ol' liver in preparation for your tailgate. Save me a cool one (or seven).

I also received a call from one of my louse buddies but I could hardly hear him. He's already there with Lynyrd Skynyrd blaring and a cooler half full of floating empties.

He said they are setting up a game of Finnish Bowling at their parking spot. Apparently, it's a cross between bowling, lawn darts, topless K-Y wrestling, egg toss, spoons and Name That Tune. I think there was something else but his phone was breaking up and a woman started screaming in German the background before the line went dead.

If you are still there, and the cops aren't involved, I'll see you in a few.

Oh yeah, there is also a race today at Richmond International Raceway. We will once again be providing the latest and greatest (and not-so great at all) news from the pits, the track, the grandstands and the steaming, staggering prairie of life that is Tailgate Nation.

Crank it up and pop a top -- it's race day!

-- Kent Jennings Brockwell, co-editor

As long as the money is green

Friday May 2 at 9:51 p.m.

Tomorrow night at the Crown Royal presents the Dan Lowry 400, you can expect to see all the cars on the track plastered with your typical sponsors' graphics -- insurance companies, car manufactures, beer brands, cell phone companies, etc.

During the Nationwide Series races however you get a few more, uh...let's say nontraditional sponsorships.

Here are the top seven best of the worst:

7. Bobby Hamilton Jr.'s No. 25 Peanut Shop of Williamsburg Ford -- He actually laughed out loud when one of the TV guys asked him about the interesting sponsorship after his qualifying run. That ain't a good sign.

6. Kenny Wallace's No. 28 U.S. Border Patrol Chevrolet -- I especially like the additional patch on the pit crew's uniforms that says "Now Hiring." I now know why my economic incentive check was only $300.

5. Kertus Davis' No. 01 RACEGIRL Chevrolet -- Besides being a professional racecar driver, I hear his wife also lets him do the dishes and all the vacuuming. At least the car isn't pink...yet.

4. Jason Keller's No. 11 America's Incredible Pizza Chevrolet -- You know it's bad when Dominos, Pizza Hut, CiCi's, Pizza Inn and Little Caesar's won't return your calls.

3. Brad Coleman's No. 27 Huggies/Kroger Ford -- Clean up on aisle 27. Nothing says cool, sexy racecar sponsorship like diapers and grocery. Well, at least it's not the dreaded Kotex/K-Mart combo.

2. Morgan Shepherd's No. 89 Victory in Jesus Racing Dodge -- Not to dis ol' J.C. but if you take history into effect, religious sponsorships usually guarantee a quick right turn into concrete at RIR. What should Jesus drive? A tow truck.